Twenty Five Tomorrow

A quarter of a century ago I wrapped my umbilical cord around my throat three times in a bid to remain in the familiar safety of my mother’s womb. It was at this point that the doctors decided to slice her open and pull me out, I was being evicted whether I liked it or not. She’s cooking my favorite meal, Pepperoni Lasagna, when I go see her tomorrow. I have a suspicion that she does this to make amends for the trauma being born caused. It’s a worthy offering though. I mean it’s lasagna with pepperonis in it and that just rocks my world.

Yeah, this is a birthday post.

I’ve written one of these almost every year. Every single one of them talked about how the next year was going to be better. Like new year’s resolutions but on a more personal level, and like new year’s resolutions I’ve almost completely failed every single time. (Twenty four was largely better than twenty three. Twenty three was a bullshit year.) For the most part they were negative, laments about how little I’d done, and how far I had to go to feel satisfied. Beyond that they were promises to work harder, read more, write more, save more, eat better, workout, etc . . .

The negative path is a easy path to take. I’ll be twenty five years old tomorrow. I’m divorced. I’m in debt.My cell phone has been cut off for months. I haven’t pursued college beyond a useless Associate’s degree.  I’m waiting tables for a living, which isn’t a bad thing. I love my restaurant and the people I work with. Careers define people, and entry level ‘server’ isn’t how anyone wants to be defined. AND I’m still not published.

Actually, that’s a lie.  I wrote an article for the local paper this year. Not only did I write that article, but the editor -one of my bar regulars- continually implores me to do more and gave me some of the most encouraging words I could ever have asked for.

I think that’s what twenty four was about. Realizing my worth despite all of those things I’m not proud of. Having done that, twenty five is going to be awesome. I’m going into this new age with a single focus, and that’s this website or rather what it embodies which is my writing. Getting my first check for something I’d written was a major step. The next step shouldn’t be nearly as hard.

That’s all I’m going to write. There’s no need for more than 500 words on a birthday post where the biggest takeaway is that I’m getting fucking PEPPERONI LASAGNA TOMORROW BITCHES.